Is Your Boyfriend Not Listening To You When You Vent?

Are Your Girls Tired Of Giving You Advice About The Same Guy Every Other Week? 

Do You Need Advice On Things That You Just Don’t Want To Share With Your Family & Friends?

Well, No Need To Worry Because I Gotchu Boo! SLC Is Here To Be Your Personal (Unlicensed Ofc) Therapist And Help Give You Advice On Anything And Everything.

Simply Submit Your Question Below For your -SLC Approved Advice To Be Featured On The ASK -SLC Website And/or ASK -SLC Instagram Page

all questions are asked anonymously

*QUESTIONS ARE ANSWERED WITHIN 24-48HRS*

 

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Answers So Far..

  • Someone asked:
    on October 31, 2024 4:07 am
    Im having a hard time on focusing on my own life, im continuously learning new things but sometimes I kept looking at other woman’s life. I put in my mind what u said last time abt how to stop being insecure abt other woman. But sometimes I keep giving fucks on other peoples lives like its tiring tbh😪 i dont like to be like this
    • SLC replied:
      on November 3, 2024 9:53 pm
      then what you have to start doing is training yourself to not look at what others are doing. if you gotta mute or delete certain people off of social media then do so. you also need to start reframing your mind. whenever you’re feeling insecure about yourself due to someone else, start telling yourself little things like ‘if she can have this lifestyle, so can i’, ‘instead of being jealous, let me feel inspired’, ‘i’m happy for her’, ‘just because she has this, doesn’t mean that i no longer can’, doing this will get you out of a insecure mindset and more into an inspired mindset. you also need to work on building up your own self esteem. once you stop criticizing yourself and choose acceptance, you can start moving forward. start reminding yourself of things that you love about yourself, both physically and mentally. start visualizing yourself as a confident person; as your dream self. would your dream self be sitting here self pitying herself because other women look good? nope, i don’t think she would. start waking up every morning knowing that you’re deserving sis. this is your life, your own beautiful, unique life. start living it and stop living through the lives of other people.
  • Someone asked:
    on October 31, 2024 4:06 am
    For anyone struggling with it i found that dealing with anxiety or Intrusive thoughts etc, whichever of those Two since it’s the same processes, through jenna overbaugh helped. she has a lot of free content on iG, spotify and her newsletter so you don’t have to pay (I didn’t).
    • SLC replied:
      on November 3, 2024 9:42 pm
      aw you’re an angel. i hope the girlies look into this💞
  • Someone asked:
    on October 31, 2024 1:11 am
    How do you keep the faith on things that your praying for?💗 im very impatient girl and im in the process of unlearning this
    • SLC replied:
      on November 3, 2024 9:40 pm
      i just have this unwavering faith that everything will work out for me. I don’t question when it will happen because i know that everything happens in due time. I always use the analogy of placing an order. when you place a order, you don’t keep placing the order over and over again because you know that your first order was placed and trust that it will arrive. same thing goes with manifesting. you asked for what you want and now you have to believe that it will come to you. The lack of belief is whats keeping you impatient. Once you know your order is placed, stop stressing over it. instead of worrying about ‘when’ its coming, get excited for its arrival in the meantime.
  • Someone asked:
    on October 30, 2024 3:53 pm
    The way i’m abusing your page for venting you should have limited opening hours 🤍
    • SLC replied:
      on October 31, 2024 12:14 am
      don’t worry sis, this page is meant for just that, as long as no one’s spamming, vent away😂💖
  • Someone asked:
    on October 30, 2024 1:50 pm
    My cousin and i were very close as children when i visited on the summers. last year there was a misunderstanding with her boyfriend where he added me on social media (she thought it was okay because it was just socials) and he sent something by mistake to me. All i told her was just that literally, that he sent something that i didn’t understand because i know that it’s best to be transparent about it you never know what other people have in mind. I didn’t say he came onto me and all i did when she introduced him to me was have her back at all times. Her boyfriend literally commented that to her that i always was backing her up. after that they broke up and she found a man like a half year later. when i came to stay in the same city for a while she was very off and i noticed she was eyeing me up side down whenever i put on a good outfit and she barely wanted to hang out with me. She has a big ego but everyone has flaws and usually she’s sweet and fun to be with, she’s dramafree and she has a good personality. I mean we’ve known eachother since we were born. she was nice and all that but she was off and i felt like she was avoiding me and not reaching out and disrespecting me in a way. It resulted in me having enough of it and giving her a taste of her own medicine and THEN it became a problem. Mind you i came to visit the same city for a longer period of time and she was out with friends every week while she was coming up with excuses why she couldn’t see me. I don’t speak to her anymore unless it’s formally at family gatherings but i felt so let down, betrayed and angry. I just thought that i meant more to her than i did, And she was one of the few people i genuinely liked being around.
    • SLC replied:
      on October 30, 2024 11:42 pm
      aw thats tough. honestly when it comes to somebodies own insecurities, there is nothing you can really do about it. it sounds like that situation with you and her ex made her insecure and thats now affecting the relationship you two have with one another. unfortunately, other rekindling through hashing things out with one another, the only other option is letting things be. sometimes even when it comes down to family, you can’t save a relationship. She has to learn to not only deal with her insecurities but to also work on her communication skills as well. ultimately, if someone doesn’t want you in their life, you have to accept it for what it is. we only have energy for those who have energy for us. i do hope though that one day y’all can rekindle because it just seems like such a petty fall out simple communication could fix.
  • Someone asked:
    on October 30, 2024 11:45 am
    Hi 🩷 have you ever dated multiple men at the same time? Would love to hear your experience. Where did you start?
    • SLC replied:
      on October 30, 2024 11:28 pm
      yes i have actually. i’m a firm believer in not putting all your eggs in one basket right from the jump. I started after 21 because i was in a 3 year-long ‘relationship’ that honestly taught me to put myself first and not tie myself down to anybody just for their sake. Once i was ready to start dating people, I definitely didn’t just talk to anybody. you still need to vet these guys out and have a certain standard set. Also contrary to popular belief, just because a woman is dating multiple people doesn’t mean she’s sleeping with all of them too. If thats how some people date then thats cool, but that wasn’t my experience. Your girl was strictly getting wined and dined honeyyy. Anyhow lol dating multiple people helped me really discover what i liked and didn’t like. You see different qualities that attract you and you see other qualities that you realize you don’t want your future man to have. All in all, i encourage women to casually date. so many women attach themselves to men way too quickly and end up getting hurt in the process. Just because you like the guy you met last week doesn’t mean that you two are now exclusive. Enjoy dating. be honest ofc and have fun with it. once you can really say ‘okay yeah i like this guy and i only wanna date him’, then you can make the decision (with the other person as well ofc) to being committed and going into the next steps of your relationship.
  • Someone asked:
    on October 30, 2024 9:42 am
    Don’t Post That Post About Storytime, But I’d Like To Hear Another Persons Perspective On It And Also Around Healing A Shame Wound❣️ 2/2
    • SLC replied:
      on October 31, 2024 12:12 am
      hi love💖 i wont post the story because you asked me to but whew did you give me a lot to read!i know most of it was just for venting purposes so im happy you got to do that and i hoped it helped. ultimately, you are still living in the past and you have to heal that little school girl inside of you that never sticked up for herself. you need to start giving yourself grace when you have these flashbacks. i know you wish you would’ve stuck up for yourself more, i know you wish people would’ve been nicer to you and i know you regret not saying/doing the things you really wanted to; HOWEVER, you have to let the past be the past. there’s no point in sitting here nitpicking what your younger self did/didn’t do. you need to forgive yourself and also show yourself the grace you deserve. at the end of the day you were still a lil girl who was scared and wanted to fit in. you did what you could at the time. those ‘friends’ were the bad ones, you did nothing wrong. if anybody should be shameful, it should be them. By holding all this animosity towards your younger self, you’re now turning into those same bullies and bullying your past self like they did. all your younger self wanted was someone to accept her so why are you not that person for yourself? i think you should write out a letter to your past self. i want you to tell her everything she would’ve needed to hear. be compassionate, be nurturing and be loving. affirm in her the strengths that you now hold. i also think you should write letters to those key people in the past who made you feel insecure. in those letters you can write to them exactly what you would’ve wanted to your younger self to say to them at the time. stand up for yourself in those letters the way your younger self couldn’t. i know it might sound silly but writing these letters will give you a form of expression and closure that you never had. moving forward from that, start practising more positive self-talk in general. there are always gonna be people out their that aren’t gonna like you, don’t let one of those people be yourself.
  • Someone asked:
    on October 30, 2024 9:12 am
    It’s nice to know sissy that im not the only one who Experiencing anxiety.. when my anxiety level heighten I tend to think that im a bit different from the other women because here in my country taking medication and going on doctors who majored in mental health is still a taboo or they will think that someone is going crazy when they’re are struggling with their mental health. I tend to be always take it personally that when people know that im struggling with anxiety they think that im going crazy or what. But i always remind myself that “i know myself, i may be more anxious than anyone but I know myself and their opinion does not matter to me” just bcoz they heard that im struggling with my mental health they judged so quickly without understanding one’s pain. Baddies deal with mental issues too, we just need to learn how to deal with it properly i guess. Btw medication or taking meds does not work that much to me, i spent a lot of money for check ups and meds but it made my anxiety worse and since I stopped taking meds my anxiety level is starting to lower down and became for manageable. Im practising now not to believe every thought that pops in my mind💗 please include me on your prayers sister. Thank you!❤️❤️
    • SLC replied:
      on October 30, 2024 11:09 pm
      i hear you girl! tbh as open as it is now, it still kinda feels taboo to discuss, especially in black communities. There’s nevr anything to be ashamed about when it comes to your mental health. Honestly a lot of people who have ‘negative’ opinions on it be the main ones with mental health issues that go unchecked because they’re too stuck in their own bias to seek real help. you’re in my prayers boo! no matter how you handle your anxiety just know that you got this. i’m rooting for you xoxo💞
  • Someone asked:
    on October 30, 2024 7:35 am
    Thank you for always answering my questions! You’re a God sent to us your fellow women. We love you big sis!💗💗
    • SLC replied:
      on October 30, 2024 11:05 pm
      you’re so welcome boo mwuahhh😘💖
  • Someone asked:
    on October 29, 2024 6:18 pm
    Do you believe That men really come back after they fumbled you? And if not do they regret it later Down the line?
    • SLC replied:
      on October 29, 2024 9:05 pm
      i do think men come back after they’ve fumbled someone. whether its a good thing or not depends on the man. some men come back because 1. they know you’ll take them back 2. they want to see if they still have you under they’re wraps 3. they’re bored/comfort. then there are other men that fumble you that really do regret it, want do better, and come back because they hope that you may give them a second chance. Even though both these men fumbled, it’s easy to tell the difference between them because there will always be a difference in actions/effort. neverrr take a man back that hasnt shown any sort of growth, accountability or effort. You’ll just be playing a long game of back and forth. especially once he knows he can come and go. in terms of if they dont come back but still regret it down the line, idk, again i think it depends on the man. Some men just know that that may have been their last chance with that person so theres no point in coming back. Doesn’t mean that they dont regret it, it just means that that door is closed & rightfully so. Overall, its really just situational, there’s no definitive answer tbh. what i do know though is that we shouldn’t even care for someone who fumbled us coming back or not. sometimes ya snooze, ya lose and thats just that.
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