Is Your Boyfriend Not Listening To You When You Vent?

Are Your Girls Tired Of Giving You Advice About The Same Guy Every Other Week? 

Do You Need Advice On Things That You Just Don’t Want To Share With Your Family & Friends?

Well, No Need To Worry Because I Gotchu Boo! SLC Is Here To Be Your Personal (Unlicensed Ofc) Therapist And Help Give You Advice On Anything And Everything.

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Answers So Far..

  • Someone asked:
    on November 13, 2024 4:11 am
    Hi big sis! How are you? Can you please share some advice on how to not rush into jumping from season to season? Like i realized that I don’t live in the moment. Like i always think about my future self, future life etc that I forgot that I have now. 😅 im currently in the season of studying my undergrad degree.
    • SLC replied:
      on November 16, 2024 11:15 pm
      hi my love, i’m good🥰 I think the best thing you can do is learn to embrace each moment your in instead of focusing on the future. you have to remind yourself that you’re only ever going to live in the present moment, so start really enjoying it. Once you have faith that your future is going to be good no matter what, it allows you to start living more in this moment. why would you sit and worry about something that you know is going to be blessed anyways? Im not saying to full on ignore your future, of course the things we do now set up our future, but you never wanna miss out on life now only having your future in mind. Right now is all we ever have. I would recommend practicing mindfulness, that includes meditating, breathing techniques, journaling, reducing distractions (yes that means that phone girl), doing activities that keep you focused on the present moment (like exercising, socializing, colouring, reading, cooking etc.) I also recommend reading ‘The power of now’, such a great book for reminding ourselves to stay in the present moment. Whenever you get caught up in your thoughts of the future, snap out of it and remind yourself to slowwwww down. All we have is right now and right now is what we should be cherishing the most. “The best way to take care of the future, is to take care of the present moment.”
  • Someone asked:
    on November 12, 2024 2:57 pm
    Hi SLC, hope all is well. I’m having a bit of a dilemma. So i’ve recently ended a 4 year long toxic relationship/situationship with my ex. I Decided to get on hinge and matched with someone. We’ve been talking for about a month and have gone on a few dates and things were going great. He would text back quickly, and if he was ever busy he Would let me know. He was very attentive, and had great conversation. After our 2nd to last date he texted me asking if i liked him and still wanted to continue talking. I replied Saying that i do and that i Enjoyed spending time with him. We werent able to see each other for about 2 weeks After that due to conflicting schedules. We finally decided on a Date and this was going to be an inside gathering at either his or my house. We decided upon his. He got us food, and i brought the drinks. The night was seemingly good to me. We watched a few movies, cuddled and talked. He initiated the cuddling and i was happy with it. It got to the end of the date and he mentioned he was getting tired and he thinks hes gonna head to bed soon. He asked me what i wanted to do, if i wanted to call an uber, have him drive me home or stay the night. I’m not one who likes to infringe on peoples personal space so i asked him What he wanted me to do. He replied that it didnt matter, it was up to me. Being that i like Direct confirmation that you want me around i decided to call my uber. While calling it, he was getting ready for bed and came out the bathroom and said okay c’mon lets go to bed. I said oh i didnt know you wanted me to stay, you didnt say that and informed him that i called my uber. Since then the energy has done a complete 180. hes not as responsive as he used to be and it seems like he doesnt want to talk anymore. I really did like him, and looked forward to speaking to him daily and spending time with him. What do you suggest i do in this situation?
    • SLC replied:
      on November 16, 2024 10:52 pm
      hmm to me this sounds like a blessing in disguise. i say this because there are two red flags, 1. it seems like he wanted something else to happen and may be upset now that it didn’t and 2. his communication skills are lacking. im sorry but as a man, why are you not being direct? okay its one thing for him to make you have the choice in if you stay over or not, but why after the fact now can he not let you know if there’s an issue? the complete 180 just seems so odd given the situation, all you did was go home lol. which is why i believe it ties into my number 1 point that he wanted something to happen and was upset that you decided to go home instead. again i could be wrong but thats what its giving. Regardles, a man not being able to communicate is a turn off. just say what it is or what it ain’t. I personally wouldn’t, but if you really do like him then maybe reach out to him and directly ask him if the date has something to do with this switch up. Maybe after that, you’ll get some clarity on the situation and you two can either continue or just leave it where its at.
  • Someone asked:
    on November 12, 2024 11:39 am
    I’d been speaking to this guy for almost 6 months, we were semi long distance but we made it work. everything was so good i have zero complaints, we spoke about the future together, family, travelling together. we would speak every single day. the most intense i’ve been with a guy, usually they can barely get a response out of me. but things were different with him. then All of a sudden he disappeared for a few days and then came back and said he wants to take a step back from the situation and the direction it was heading in. Essentially pulling back before it became a relationship. He said it wasn’t me and he had things to deal with etc. but he has literally abandoned me and left me for dead. from an extreme high to absolutely nothing and he said he can’t say when he’ll be ready again, could be a few weeks, could be months. i’m literally tore up honestly, i thought he was the one, everything was so good. i don’t know what to do. i’m hurting so bad and he’s just living as normal, not speaking to me, i don’t get it. this was all so cold. any advice would be appreciated I miss him
    • SLC replied:
      on November 16, 2024 10:40 pm
      i’m so sorry that happened to you sis. it definitely sounded like he love bombed you. it also sounded like he might of got cold feet as well. He never wanted commitment no matter what sweet dreams he was trying to sell you. you might not see it as such but it might have been a good thing he ended it before it got any further. i know you already had strong feelings for him but imagine you two prolonged it or actually committed and then he dropped this bomb. As much as it hurts now just know that its for the best. you don’t wanna be with someone whose wishy-washy anyways girl. The best advice i can give to you is what i give to all my girlies going through breakups; grieve the relationship (its okay to feel hurt and betrayed, your feelings are valid), focus more on you and doing the things you love (the best revenge is no revenge and just upgrading your life without them) and finally i would say don’t let this make you cold. As you said you normally don’t even respond to guys so i know probably feel extra hurt because the one person you actually gave a chance to did this, but don’t let this situation turn you cold or heartless. Should you be more mindful going forward ofc, but don’t let this situation stop you from meeting your person. There is someone out there who is going to treat you the way you deserve. this guy just wasn’t it. Every situation we go through we can either become a victim to it or take it as a lesson and move forward. don’t give him that power of making you a victim, move forward sis.
  • Someone asked:
    on November 12, 2024 7:04 am
    I’m tired of everything
    • SLC replied:
      on November 14, 2024 11:25 pm
      “Sending love to everyone who is just… tired. Life is a lot, and sometimes the answer to it all is to just be still and silent for a while. Give yourself space and grace. Whether it’s decision fatigue, information fatigue, anxiety fatigue, routine fatigue, getting-your-life-back-together fatigue, career fatigue, social fatigue, financial fatigue, or physical fatigue, take a moment to breathe and recharge. You deserve it.” That quote is from one of my favorite pages @wetheurban. I’m sharing it because i want you to know that you’re not alone. I’m sorry you feel over everything and tbh lately i’ve been feeling like that too, but we can’t let these negative emotions control our lives. I know it might sound cliche, but it does get better. Good is coming, and if you cant see the good then you have to create it yourself. You are in control of your life. Your perspective is everything. Is your half glass empty or half full? the more you feed into the negativity, the more it surrounds you. you have to create goodness in yourself. do things that excite you, do things that you look forward to and give yourself grace through it all. We are responsible for our own happiness. The bad days do suck, but that doesn’t mean you have to have a bad LIFE. Somehow, someway, everything is going to work out.
  • Someone asked:
    on November 7, 2024 2:22 pm
    I crossed the line and started sleeping with my male best friend who is also my daughters god father. He’s a great person and he is a big help to me with my child. but the problem is he is a man whore!! i knew this before i got into this Situation but i never thought we would end up like this. we love each other so much. We have so much fun when we’re together. We just came back from tulum a few weeks ago and had a great time. the sex is sooooo good i cant get enough of him. I have fell in too deep i dont know what to do now. We are not exclusive but my feelings have gotten too involved. I’m usually smarter than this and i Wouldn’t get in a situation like this. Sometimes i want to fall back and go back to being friends but i dont want to let go either. What do i need to do?
    • SLC replied:
      on November 7, 2024 11:08 pm
      i think you and him need to have a conversation about where you both want this relationship to go. with your feelings deeply involved now, its only going to hurt you more if you two don’t figure out where this is headed. you may want exclusivity but he may not. he may just want a friends with benefits situation but you may not. maybe you both want a relationship. maybe you both think it’s better to just remain friends. whatever the outcome is, it takes communication from you both to figure it out. you don’t want your time being wasted and your feelings being hurt. especially seeing as he’s your best friend, the future of your relationship (platonic or romantic) can get tricky the longer you to string this out with no mutual understanding on what the situation is. start thinking about what you really want and once you decide on that, you need to see where his heads at too. it’s not only a romantic relationship on the line, but your friendship as a whole in general. At the end of the day, sex/love/fun aside, you know whats best for you. if he’s not it, then all the fun & games need to stop before your feelings get even more deeper than they already are. always trust your instincts girl xoxo
  • Someone asked:
    on November 7, 2024 4:16 am
    Hey darling, how can i step in my femininity and romanticise my life. I don’t Feel confident and whenever I am with my friends i always look like the one that is not put together. I’m going to turn 23 next month and i really want to change. 💕💕💕
    • SLC replied:
      on November 7, 2024 11:26 pm
      hi my love, happy early birthday💖 to start ima tell you what femininity is not, femininity is not all about looking like a pin-up house wife that a lot of these ‘femininity gurus’ are teaching. There is no one stop look on femininity so don’t think that you have to wear ‘modest’ clothes or have your hair a specific style in order to be viewed as feminine. You don’t have to emulate any celebrity or influencer, your feminine energy is personal and should be catered to you. Now that thats all said and done here are some tips to tap into your feminine energy. 1. self care is a must – get your nails done, take care of your skin, learn to do your make up in ways that suits your face, dress the part; again this doesn’t mean wear pink long dresses 24/7 but still look presentable and stylish in your own way, get a signature smell (invest in perfumes girl) , pamper yourself 2. practice good posture/speak with confidence, stand up straight, keep your head up high, confidence is a key factor in looking/feeling more feminine. start speaking confidence in yourself with daily affirmations and positive self talk. Also, speak as though every word you say is something of substance and importance. Slow it down, 3. Related to that last point is to smile more, a feminine woman is soft, graceful and approachable. Move with more love and compassion. Feminine energy is attractive energy! 4. Don’t be afraid to be more sensual, embrace your sexuality and appeal. Be the type of woman who can seduce anyone with just her eyes. Have a playful but alluring side about you. 5. remain teachable; intelligence is one of the most attractive traits. Whether its through reading, taking courses/classes, podcasts, youtube videos, stay educated on topics that interest you. I’ll also leave you with some femininity affirmations you can repeat on the daily to further your femininity journey. 1. ‘ i am divine’ 2. I’m so lucky, i always get what i want’ 3. ‘I am connected to the divine feminine energy within me 4. ‘I exude beauty and grace’ 5. My softness is my strength 6. I am a divine woman 7. I am constantly growing into the best version of me. 8. I am a source of love, light and healing for myself and others. 9. I am aware of my worth and my power. 10. I am magnetic and always get what I desire. i hope this helps, there’s also this feminine tumblr page that i love that shares a lot of femininity tips : https://www.tumblr.com/feminineenergylife, there’s plenty more femininity-centred accounts you can find through that page as well. good luck on your femininity journey xoxo 🎀
  • Someone asked:
    on November 6, 2024 6:55 pm
    💙
    • SLC replied:
      on November 7, 2024 11:15 pm
      💖
  • Someone asked:
    on November 5, 2024 1:10 am
    How do you feel about making new friends ? I spent all of high school with my girls and few years after graduating i started to notice how i was being a better friend to them than they were to me. I stopped talking to them and every time i do they always say they thought something bad Happened to me, which i think is weird because i usually think well of them when we don’t talk. Idk i just dont think its worth holding on to. Or am i just buggin?
    • SLC replied:
      on November 6, 2024 3:38 am
      if people aren’t reciprocating your energy, then they don’t deserve to be in your life. you shouldn’t have to always be the giver in your friendships. there’s no point in holding on to any relationship where you’re being undervalued. i’m proud of you for deciding that you deserve more than half-assed friends. it doesn’t have to end with any animosity either, like you said, you still wish them well. don’t ever think that you’re bugging over holding a set of standards for yourself. there is always better. there are people out there that will value you, so embrace making new friends.
  • Someone asked:
    on November 4, 2024 4:09 am
    I’m having a hard time comforting the guy i like, he told me he needs space because im stressing him out more when im trying my best to comfort him but it seems like its not working. Btw its a car situation hes dealing with with his brakes and idk anything about cars, i just wanted to comfort him… hes a overthinker so its challenging for me to help him think positive.
    • SLC replied:
      on November 6, 2024 3:22 am
      honestly boo you may think you’re helping him but you might be making it worse. if he’s saying what he needs right now is space, then respect his wishes. i know you wanna be there to comfort him because you like him, but by not giving him the space he’s asking for, you could be pushing him away more. some people just need to deal with things on their own and the best thing you can do is show them support, but from a distance.
  • Someone asked:
    on November 3, 2024 10:51 pm
    Retail is not for the weak 😒. Why are some elderly women just so B*tchy and weird acting towards younger women especially the ones They feel bothered by for no reason? Please tell me why during my shift I told an elderly the Amout of money on her new receipt that will be going back to her card for a returned item and she asked me a question and I answered it, then I told her to have a nice evening handing her the receipt. She cut me off and handed me a plastic bag to throw away and ignoring my kind statement and talked to my elderly coworker that was literally right next to me on another register, telling the lady to call her and it was nice seeing her again ” before leaving. I honestly felt like that was Deliberate because when I told her the amount of money going back to her card she answered me with a question then I handed it to her saying have a nice evening then she cut me off handing me a trash bag to throw away and not saying anything back to me. The Elderly lady that was my coworker she helped me out but it seemed like if I did something wrong, it felt like as if she was tryna embarrass me sometimes as a new hire in front of customers because the register I work on its a lot to learn, it’s not a regular register and you have to do more than bag and ring up items. So there was a younger lady that needed to exchange and buy the same item in a bigger size and I asked my elderly female coworker for help , I asked her if I this id the way to do something and she said yes but later on i got into a jam with the ladies transaction and there was somewhat if a line and she asked me what did I do? But nothing would’ve happened if the lady had tried to physically show me what to do instead of leaving me because I’m still trying to grasp everything. And she was telling me how to call customers up when I’d say next or whoever. But after that disrespected older women that ignored me and gave me trash to throw away I may not end up telling most customers have a good day because I don’t want to waste energy and rather give people their items and let them go about their day. The same female coworker didn’t even tell that lady that knows her that I said have a nice day, so I hope she doesn’t expect me to always smile with every customer and tell have a great day etc. She must be friends with that old rude hag 🙄. I don’t really Trust a lot of Elderly Women and very few have been genuinely kidney and sweet to me despite me being kind and unproblematic. It sucks for them that in a couple years your going to be gone and this is how you want to treat younger people?
    • SLC replied:
      on November 6, 2024 3:20 am
      whew girl you do not need to tell me about the horrors of retail.. i worked retail from 15-21, im 26 now and i still have to remind myself that not all people are evil like the ones i came across while working😭 tbh, some of these old ladies just be bitter and jealous. point blank period. they think that they’re age holds power of you and use that as an excuse to be disrespectful. don’t let this one lady stop you from being nice to other customers because like you said there are some genuine ones. and don’t let that older coworker ruin your shifts either. at the end of the day it’s all about when that direct deposit hits. there were days that i just had to remind myself that i’m just here for the coins and im not gonna let no one get me out of character. I don’t know her position but a lot of the disrespect can come from her knowing that you’re much younger than her yet you’re both in the same position of work. its a shame that instead of being someone with experience that you can lean on, she chose to be a hater instead. you can’t let that energy phase you sis, clock in, do your work, get your bag, and clock tf out!
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