Is Your Boyfriend Not Listening To You When You Vent?

Are Your Girls Tired Of Giving You Advice About The Same Guy Every Other Week? 

Do You Need Advice On Things That You Just Don’t Want To Share With Your Family & Friends?

Well, No Need To Worry Because I Gotchu Boo! SLC Is Here To Be Your Personal (Unlicensed Ofc) Therapist And Help Give You Advice On Anything And Everything.

Simply Submit Your Question Below For your -SLC Approved Advice To Be Featured On The ASK -SLC Website And/or ASK -SLC Instagram Page

all questions are asked anonymously

*QUESTIONS ARE ANSWERED WITHIN 24-48HRS*

 

Your question is saved and will appear when it is answered.

Answers So Far..

  • Someone asked:
    on April 15, 2022 5:59 pm
    I honestly feel like I’m missing out on certain aspects of Life like having no idea Of what career I want to be in or having an idea what I want to do with my life, plus being a 17-Year-Old Girl, And having never been in a relationship before or other things that comes With it. It makes me feel like like I will never experience it or I am not attractive enough or not Desirable by anyone and maybe my bullies are right that I am ugly, have no future etc.
    • SLC replied:
      on April 17, 2022 2:06 am
      Okay girl, let’s start at the end of your paragraph. It’s definitely not okay to speak about yourself the way you do. Question, would you speak to your friends the same way you just did to yourself? We both know the answer, so I’m going to leave that to you. It’s important to be kind / speak highly about yourself because, at the end of the day, all you got is you. If you are your biggest critic ( in a negative way) , who else will you have to turn to? Start by reflecting on what you love about yourself internally and externally. It may sound corny, but repeating those affirmations on a daily basis will really improve the way you think/feel along with your well-being. Secondly, if you talk about yourself in a negative way, you make more space for negativity in your life. For example, when you bring up the topic of not ever being in a relationship, you will continue to think that the reason behind it is because of all the things you just mentioned. Therefore, you will continue to fill up that space with hatred & it will be difficult for you to think that you are deserving of love. If you think about it, you’re manifesting the opposition to receiving everything love has to offer from a potential person. You also need to realize that you are soooooo young sis! I know you’ve probably heard this before, but your time will come. I promise you. Don’t compare your situation to those that have already been in a relationship. That’s wonderful for them and it is for you too! If anything, you can take pointers from your friends and see how you can set yourself up for your first relationship, and you can also determine from the experience of others, what you like and what you don’t. So use that as amo in the meantime, and take this time while you’re single to learn about who you really are and what makes you, you. Focus on your self-growth and self-love, and work on building a better you while. Someone will come along eventually, and if you love that person, then it’s just another bonus to what you’ve already been working on! You’re going to look back at this one day, & you’re going to be okay with the fact that a relationship didn’t instantly happen. don’t rush it and don’t force it. Also, seeing that you are 17, it sounds like you just got straight out of high school. Trust me, it is OKAY to not have an idea of what you want to do. Let me repeat myself girl, you’re SO young. It’s crazy how we’re expected to have it figured out in an instant. What I can say to you is really brainstorm on what you love to do most & try to attach it to a career path. Maybe dip your feet into it a little more. For example, if you want to be a nurse, you might be able to volunteer at your local hospital and see a day in the life of how they operate. If you want to be an actor go watch some theatre, and take acting classes to see if you have a chance of falling in love with it. If you want to be a flight attendant, take yourself to the airport and ask them the reality of their everyday life and whether or not it seems enjoyable. Don’t sit at home wondering about these things. Really put in the effort. One thing I will say is that if you decide to take a year off, I URGE YOU to not waste it. Ensure that you are doing things that will help you make a decision in regards to what you want to do and at the same time PLEASE work and save as much money as you can. Be responsible with your finances, you’ll thank yourself in the long run. Don’t be too hard on yourself, believe in yourself, love yourself, have faith, do things that’ll make you happy , work for what you want and God and the universe will do the rest! You got this, don’t even trip! xo!
  • Someone asked:
    on March 24, 2022 6:01 pm
    i lost my virginity to a boy i really liked, but it’s not the sex that bothered me. the connection was amazing between us, almost unreal. i made him wait 8 months thinking that would make him want me more, Oblivious that he didn’t even want me fr. The reassurance… acting like he wanted ME for ME… helping him through HIS problems… was all useless. as soon as i gave it up to him he switched up. slut-shaming me, being dry, calling me out of my name, and ghosting me right after. he tried to blame me for giving him an STD (mind you he was the only dude i had sex with) So i knew he was lying on me to protect his own shame. before i could even defend myself he stopped talking to me completely, wouldn’t even let me defend myself knowing damn well i Couldn’t have given him anything. I tried moving on by focusing on myself thinking things would get better only to get test results saying i had contracted a STD… it was from Him. Thankfully the medicine i’m taking will resolve it in a couple of days but i can’t help but shake the used, helpless, and unfinished feeling, especially of giving an ain’t shit dude my body and not being able to communicate with him. i completely cut him off on all platforms but i still find myself having a soul-tie connection with him. i feel awful because i know he’s never coming back and isn’t even thinking about me anymore. He Hated Feeling Vulnerable But I Assured Him I Wasn’t There To Hurt Him, But As Soon As It Was Me He Hopped On That Opportunity. he claimed to preach “communication is key” but dipped without even letting me say how i feel. i have so much confidence in my body, style, and looks but i slowly feel it fading away sis… how do i turn my hurt and anger into a better me? i refuse to feel like this forever and wanna get back on my shit!
    • SLC replied:
      on March 25, 2022 1:20 pm
      Girl firstly, screw him. I know how much it may hurt to just see someone you care about completely switch up on you; but when I tell you karma will work its magic, IT WILL. I know he was your first so you have that connection or ‘soul-tie’ towards him. It’s completely normal to still think about him. However, there’s nothing you can do but move on. No amount of time spent regretting it and beating yourself up about it will change what happened. If he’s blocked on everything, keep it that way. Don’t check up on what he’s doing either. Out of sight = Out of mind. Don’t go looking to fill that void anywhere else either. Heal first. Mentally and physically. Time heals wounds, especially if you put in the work with it. Patience, time, compassion, and self-love + putting in the work to heal will do wonders for you. If you don’t already, I would recommend journaling. It’ll help get all those thoughts in your head out. The more you talk through your emotions and feelings, the easier it is to heal. If you have a support system, lean on them too. Don’t let that inner shine you have be dimmed because of someone else’s insecurities/narcissism. YOU ARE THE SHIT. Do things that remind you of that. You’ll be okay baby girl.
  • Someone asked:
    on March 22, 2022 8:27 pm
    So My Boyfriend Broke Up With Me Yesterday Because Of Something I Did, It Really Hurts Because We Talked About Our Future Daily And I Really Love Him I Think I Always Will But The Thing Is Im So Scared To See Him With Someone Else The Break Up Broke Me But Seeing Him With Another Girl Will Ruin Me
    • SLC replied:
      on March 23, 2022 2:32 pm
      This one is sticky because technically, I don’t know what you did for him to want to separate from you. The best thing you can do though, is give him his space and ask for forgiveness. If he’s willing to work it out with you, then great. If not, you just have to accept and respect his decision. Heartbreaks hurt but the best thing you can do for yourself is to move on with your life. Baby steps if you have to. Literally, take it one day at a time. It won’t be impossible to get over it, eventually with time you will. Sometimes relationships aren’t meant to last and they’re really there to teach us lessons. If the relationship doesn’t work out in the end, at least it was a learning lesson for you.
  • Someone asked:
    on March 21, 2022 12:01 am
    How can i not feel like a loser or not got a Enough When i’ve been a Terrible person to people for so many years and i hurt those people that where my Friends and family because of my Trauma i want to change badly ? And how do I not feel worthless and a loser When i have failed every year and i Don’t really so a huge change in myself ?
    • SLC replied:
      on March 21, 2022 11:35 pm
      Firstly, who said you were a loser? Who said you aren’t good enough? Those are all limiting beliefs that you have in your head that you need to remove asap. Listen I don’t know what you’ve done to feel like such a ‘terrible’ person, but I promise you, it’s not something that should be continuously making yourself feel guilty about. We all make mistakes, and we all fuck up, that’s what being human is all about. The difference is how you go about it. You can either sit here and cry and feel guilty about yourself OR you can forgive yourself and change the narrative. We are forever evolving, so there’s no reason why you should let your past dictate who you are now and what you want to be. Let go of the ‘loser’ and ‘terrible person’ image, and step into who you know you can be. Failure isn’t the end. Change your mindset. Forgive yourself. You’ll feel a whole lot better. You’ll be able to focus on a new you. If you want change, create it.
  • Someone asked:
    on March 20, 2022 11:47 pm
    I’m in college but i dont know what i want to major in i know i want to make 6k+ figures a month so i can be Financially stable and financially free and support myself and my family how can i get their ? . Also Another question I do i Become the best version of myself Physically mentally emotionally etc etc but not do to please people from my past or around me help please ?
    • SLC replied:
      on March 21, 2022 11:49 pm
      It’s okay to not know what you want to do. A lot of rich people actually say it’s better to do what you love than to do what you hate just for the sake of making money. I know you want to be able to reach financial freedom, but I don’t want you to put too much pressure on yourself to get there. Firstly, I recommend just doing some research. Go on YouTube, listen to podcast, tik toks, read books, go on blogs, etc., and just research different ways to make money (and what specific fields to get into). See if any of those interest you and from there make an attempt. Remember that there’s no one way to become financially free and it may not be something you’ll get asap. You may love one thing you thought you’d hate, and you may hate something you thought you’d love. That’s what figuring ourselves out is all about though. The more time you put into investing in yourself & learning, the better the opportunity is to get there. Again though, make sure it’s a major or a business opportunity that actually interests you. The worst feeling is being stuck doing something you hate. In terms of becoming the best version of yourself, it’s all about consistency, discipline, and self-love. The same way you’re investing in your career, invest in yourself too. Have a vision of your ‘best you’ in mind, and strive to be her every day. Becoming our ‘best self’ doesn’t happen overnight; and that’s where discipline comes in. Visualize. Learn you. Do things that make you happy. Do things that inspire you. Treat yourself with the love you deserve. Most importantly, remind yourself of your ‘why’ & keep in mind your bigger picture.
  • Someone asked:
    on February 16, 2022 9:35 am
    Heyy.. recently i want to work on myself and i want to keep my vibes high everytime.. i believe in manifestation and i want to achieve all my day to day desires.. and most importantly i always doubt myself can i manifest my sp… So please can you help me with all thess problems and suggest me some tips!? Thanks!!!
    • SLC replied:
      on February 16, 2022 11:36 pm
      All you really have to do is believe that what you’re manifesting is coming to you and persist in putting in the effort needed. Rewire all your old beliefs/self-doubts, and know that what you now desire is already claimed by you. Whatever you need to hear yourself say, say it aloud or write it out. Every day. It’ll help you to start believing it. What you want is yours and meant for you. Affirm like it’s your reality. Script like it’s your reality. Visualize like it’s your reality. Claim whatever you want as yours. There are plenty of ways to manifest but whatever works for you, is what you should continue to do. (I recommend reading up on more manifestation/ LOA books, the more knowledge you have the easier it will be) Most importantly have patience. Don’t be so caught up on instant results that you leave yourself thinking that you’re doing something wrong. Let your manifestations flow to you. They already exist so why stress about when they are coming?
  • Someone asked:
    on January 29, 2022 6:42 pm
    hi ❤️ I don’t know what to study at University & I’m not sure about what i want to do either. i feel like i have lots sight of my vision & i don’t know what to do anymore. it’s really overwhelming.
    • SLC replied:
      on January 30, 2022 2:33 pm
      I definitely understand where you’re coming from. Stepping out of high school (or even after a break from education period) with a lot of ideas in mind or none at all can be stressful. One thing I will say is you will definitely find your route. If you’re unsure of what you want to do, maybe take some time off, do some research or attempt to test out different things. For example, if you think you might want to get into business, do research about it, try to speak to people who are in that field, and get more insight. If you’re into arts, put yourself out there and meet people that are in that industry. The more insight you know, the more comfort and excitement you’ll feel about choosing what is right for you. trust me you’ll be on the right path. Keep in mind that life is trial and error. So you may try something and dislike it or you might fall in love. Don’t rush, take it one step at a time and trust the process. Some people don’t find their passion until they’re in their 30s or 50s etc., so know that you’re not alone and in reality, most of us don’t know what the hell we’re doing half the time. Always show up for yourself, do your best not to slack, be proactive, and don’t be afraid to take risks. You never know who you’ll meet or what doors will open for you. The excitement of the unknown awaits you. All the best 💗
  • Someone asked:
    on January 26, 2022 5:26 am
    My boyfriend treats me bad but I can’t leave because I have no friend and no one to talk to..if I leave it’d hurt me… I’m battling depressive disorders and I feel no one can love me with that I’m in a very toxic space and I cry almost everyday…I need help. But it seems there’s no help around… I’m trying to get my finances right before I can leave ..he treats me really bad and plays the pity card Now I think I’m always wrong no matter how hard I try to act right
    • SLC replied:
      on January 27, 2022 2:57 am
      Babe this whole situation sounds way too toxic. I know you may feel alone but you aren’t. There are resources out there to help you, especially with your mental health. Don’t be afraid to reach out to them. You cannot stay with a person just so that you don’t feel lonely. You’re hurting yourself more by staying. You are loveable, don’t ever think that you have to stay with someone because no one else will love you. Get that out of your head. In fact, if you gotta write it down or repeat ‘I am worthy of love’ every day so that it sticks in your head, do that. Whatever you have with your boyfriend isn’t love, it’s a toxic form of codependency. I don’t know the depths of your current situation but I do know that whatever it is, you need to leave this guy. I promise you, you will flourish once that huge part of toxicity leaves your life. Then you can focus on your mental health, gaining friends/building new relationships, setting yourself up right financially, and most importantly loving yourself the way you deserve to be loved.
  • Someone asked:
    on January 19, 2022 2:17 pm
    Hi! I’m kind of having a Recurring issue in my relationship! First off im a high school senior about to graduate in may And ive been dating my Boyfriend for two years. I love him Don’t get me wrong but i don’t think i love him as much as he he loves me. All My life i Never got a chance to be in a relationship with a guy where he liked me as much as i like him and i cant help but think what thats like, which brings me to my real problem: so there’s this other guy We were best friends in the 8th grade ( he’s a grade behind me) and there were feelings there on Both our sides but just never acted on. We still talk off and on til this day and we hung a couple of months ago and that was when i realized i wanted something different. Part of me wants to try to pursue It but another part is scared I’ll be rejected. I really just want to know if we could be something before i graduate. But I’m just so conflicted because i don’t want to Hurt my boyfriend but i also am in love with someone else. Do I sound crazy? I know i shouldn’t be focused on things like this but i am. Please help me!
    • SLC replied:
      on January 20, 2022 1:50 pm
      There’s no point in wasting you and your current boyfriend’s time if you know there’s something more that you want sis. A lot of times we stay in relationships out of what we think is “love” but is really just “comfort”. Don’t get me wrong, I do believe you love him, but not enough to want to be with him if you’re having thoughts about another guy. If you know in your heart that this current boyfriend is someone who you don’t see yourself with in the long run… if it hurts him or not, you gotta let it go. Now when it comes to this other guy, I wouldn’t say completely jump into a new relationship with him, but see where you guys stand when it comes to being more than friends. You say you’re in love with him but you could just be in love with the thought of being with him. Rejection sucks but it’s the only way of freeing yourself of the ‘what if’s’. Overall my advice is for you is to figure out your situation with your current boyfriend. From that decision, then see where things could go with this other guy. Remember not to rush anything and most importantly FOCUS ON YOU! You’re about to graduate girl, make sure regardless of all this relationship ‘drama’, that you’re focused on yourself and your future.
  • Someone asked:
    on January 17, 2022 11:16 am
    I dont How explain this, this boy always simps for me and Apologies everytime we get in a Argument that same day now he act like He dont care anymore yea He’ll text me but we still dont get nowhere what should i do i love him so much i dont know if i should leave or stay its soooo toxic
    • SLC replied:
      on January 17, 2022 2:18 pm
      sis you said it yourself, “it’s soooo toxic”. We don’t have time for anything toxic ’round here. Unless you like playing annoying mind games back and forth, let it go. You can’t let a man just sit and act like he doesn’t care about you. YOU are the prize. If it’s toxic and draining, my best advice to you is to let it go. Your peace > Everything else.
Instagram