Is Your Boyfriend Not Listening To You When You Vent?

Are Your Girls Tired Of Giving You Advice About The Same Guy Every Other Week? 

Do You Need Advice On Things That You Just Don’t Want To Share With Your Family & Friends?

Well, No Need To Worry Because I Gotchu Boo! SLC Is Here To Be Your Personal (Unlicensed Ofc) Therapist And Help Give You Advice On Anything And Everything.

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Answers So Far..

  • Someone asked:
    on April 13, 2023 11:15 pm
    Hey Girl , So I Met This Guy Back In Like 2020-2021 ( We Gonna Call Him K ) I’ve Always Thought He Was A Sweet Guy From Jump But I Didn’t See Us Getting Closer Than What It Was For Example, At The Time It Really Wasn’t a Thing Just Lil Dates And Texting Here And There ( We Did Have Sex A Few Times ) Nothing Too Crazy, Because At The Same Time I Was In A Situationship With This Other Guy And Texting Other Ppl ( No Background Story Needed About Him really Lol ) So Around That Time ( 2021 – Aug 2022) I Was So Into The Situationship And So In My Head About It, That I Would Block K And Whoever Else I’m Entertaining In The Moment Just Off The Fact That One Man Pissed Me Off So All Of Em Gotta Go , So Fast Forward To Oct 2022 I’m Situationship Free For 1-2 Months Now And I Decide To Unblock K After Maybe A Few Weeks Of No Communication At All, So Now It’s The Same Thing From When We Met, We Spoke Maybe Once Or Twice About Him Being My Boyfriend And Vice Versa But At The Time I Wasn’t Serious Fr, So Now Nov 22 I’m Still Talking To K and Other Ppl (I Never Mentioned To K That I Was Dealing/Talking/Dating With Other Men At The Same Time ) So Now It’s Jan 2023 And Now I Just Want K ( We Still Haven’t Had An Official Conversation) , But I Felt Locked In With K , Now We’re Seeing Each other Alot, Sex , Dates, Spending Nights, Spending $$ , Etc , So Fast Forward To Now April 2023 I Found Out He Has Not Only Been With Me Physically And Sexually But A Few Other Girls Also For Some Time Now Not Sure How Long Or If It’s Even Something New, So After A Day Of Acting Normal I Confronted Him, His Response Was ” Those Weren’t His Intentions, & He Never Wanted me To See That Side Of Him Because He Knew That I’ve Grown To Adore Him ” And Some More Things Of That Nature , So The Same Day I Went Back To Him , Sat In Silence While Drunk, Had Sex, ( He Told Me He Love me , He Sorry And He Just Want Me To Be Happy During Sex ) … Fast Forward To Now I Basically Told Him There’s No Need For Any Of This At This Big Age And We See Each Other When We Do, Speak When We speak, My Question Is Am I Giving Hypocrite Energy? Also Am I Overreacting Being That I Have Been Dealing With Multiple Ppl Until I Felt I Was Ready And Never Really Spoke On It? I haven’t chosen to leave but I haven’t chosen to stay Im Just Stuck But He Do Make Me Happy I Just Know Rn I Don’t Trust His Character, Words Or Actions… Opinions ?
    • SLC replied:
      on April 15, 2023 5:15 pm
      girl i’m not gonna lie to you, you are being a bit of a hypocrite. You cannot sit and question his word/character when he doesn’t even know that you were also with other people prior to you wanting to be with him. At the end of the day, BOTH of y’all wanted to have your cake and eat it too. He was doing his thing on the side while you were doing your thing on the side. So in this situation, you can’t really blame him. You gotta be completely fair and understand that you were also doing the same thing. If you want to have a relationship with him now moving forward, you’re gonna have to be more transparent. Let him know that you were also dealing with other people too, but now you really do just want to be with him (if that’s how you still feel). Honesty is the best policy when it comes to a healthy relationship. In the future, if you do find yourself in a situation similar to this one, you need to set your boundaries from the jump and let it be known if you/the other person will be talking to other people, having different sexual partners etc., because one thing about karma, it comes right back around.
  • Someone asked:
    on April 9, 2023 10:31 am
    ive been with this boy for so long and we got into it really bad and he told me i made him the way he is now but ive did everything i could for him , nothing but love him for 6 years and stayed with him after he did the worst to me , im just so Confused on how i made him that way
    • SLC replied:
      on April 15, 2023 5:22 pm
      I wish i had a little more context on the situation and what exactly he means by ‘you made him the way he is now,’ but since i don’t what i can say/focus on is the fact that you said you’re still with him after he’s done the ‘worst’ to you. Baby that is not a badge of honour you wanna have. Going through a bunch of bullshit in a relationship just to show how loyal you are is not something to be proud of. You don’t deserve struggle love. Especially if what you’re saying about loving him for 6 years through it all is true. I’m not saying you have to breakup with him but i just want to leave you to ask yourself if all that love you’re giving someone who is blaming you for their potential bad ways is worth it. What i will say though is that you just definetly have a conversation about that exact statment he said and figure out what he means. He may be holding some resentment on you that you might not even know about. That tends to happen in a lot of long term relationships. So have that conversation and also figure out if this relationship is worth it all.
  • Someone asked:
    on March 24, 2023 4:49 am
    Hey so i comment on here In november about my bf yall told me to leave but i didnt 🤦🏿‍♀️ He having An baby w his ex so the baby was born yesterday at 6 and she didnt even tell him not to my knowledge And im thinking the plan was him being at the Hospital while shs haves the baby cause that what she was bugging our whole relationship abt then when the time finally came she ain budged or even tell him to come to hospital and keep in mind she has an whole boyfriend around the same amount Of time me and my bf was together my question Is why you think she ain call him For Him to be at the hospital when she bug and annoyed causes so many problems In our relationship for him just not see his first child born then she posted “im doing what best for my son even it hurt people in the process“ i just need opinions
    • SLC replied:
      on March 25, 2023 12:54 am
      hi girl, well im not gonna say i told you so because that’s not what im here for. I do remember telling you back in November that it was ultimately your decision and you chose to stay, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing if you do want to be with this man. However this situation that you’re bringing up now is what i was telling you that you’re gonna have to be prepared for. They have a child together, and now the child is here, they are technically a family. When it comes to this specific problem, i don’t think you really have a say. This issue is really just between your boyfriend and his baby mother. All you can do is support him because at the end of the day, this issue doesn’t involve you. I just want you to know though that this i just the BEGINNING of the stress that is about to come with dealing with these two. So now i want you to think long and hard for a second. Back in November i said you need to figure out if this relationship is worth it or not. So again i’m going to ask you, is this relationship with your boyfriend and all the potential stress you’re about to deal with worth it? If you still think it is then honestly keep doing what you’re doing and just learn to take a backseat to anything that revolves around them and their child. If its not then you need to be honest with yourself and end the relationship.
  • Someone asked:
    on March 22, 2023 4:09 pm
    Heyy, i wanted to know how long you think A talking stage should last?? I’ve been Seeing this guy for over 6 months and i Don’t know when we’re gonna pass this Beginning stage of dating
    • SLC replied:
      on March 23, 2023 8:20 pm
      Hi boo, first and foremost I can’t give you a definitive answer because …. there isn’t one. ‘Talking stages’ range from couple to couple. There are people that ‘talk’ for a few weeks and become boyfriend/girlfriend and there are people who ‘talk’ for years with nothing to show for it. I think If you want to figure out what’s going on with your situation, you have to be vocal about it. I’m not saying you have to straight up ask “what are we”. But you should definitely be able to communicate and come to a common ground about where this relationship is going. One thing women have to know is men are not that intuitive on certain things. Some men will literally see you being content with where you are in a situationnship and assume that you are okay with the way things are going. This is why you need to commutate with him and be vocal about what it is you’re looking for. If he is on the same page as you then great you guys can move forward. If he’s not on the same page as you then you know that you don’t need to be wasting any more time with him and move on. Speak up, be vocal, communicate🗣. At the end of the day this is YOUR time you’re putting into this. Don’t be out here wasting it.
  • Someone asked:
    on March 19, 2023 5:27 pm
    hiii. so i have a a guy that ive been seeing for like a year and a half off and on but we mainly only stay inside when we hangout. hes so sweet and ive recently only been hanging out With him but ive gotten so attached. He’s a very awkward person when it comes to feelings and i know im the only person hes seeing and we are still nothing more than a “link” i guess is what you would call it. i care a lot about abt him and it seems like he cares about. ive tried to tell him i like him and i want something more but He’s bad about communication when it comes to telling our feelings so he really just answers my attempt at telling him by trying to get me to say i like him directly, like presses me into just admitting how i feel but then it gets Uncomfortable. i Don’t wanna tell him i like him cause i know his last relationship Was bad and he has a super busy schedule with football im just scared of how he might react and i dont want things awkward between us. anyways i really love him n dont know what to do. i wanna get him a little gift for his game coming up but my friends are like nah That’s dumb dont do GF things but it really is just cause i love him bad. idk what to do abt the whole thing
    • SLC replied:
      on March 20, 2023 4:07 pm
      In terms of getting him that gift, ima have to agree with your friends on this one, don’t do girlfriend things when you are just a ‘link’ and don’t do wife things when you’re only the girlfriend. Now when it comes to everything else, baby you already spent a year and a half playing the guessing game, its time to figure out whats going on forreal. I get that he may have communication issues but if you’re ever going to be something more than a ‘link’ communication is NEEDED, on both parts at that. If you don’t want to be the first one to say it, you need to directly ask him how he feels about you, no bs. Be like ‘i want you to be for real with me and tell me what you think of me and what we’re doing’. You can’t just be a link forever, its about to be two years babe. Now depending on what he says, you make your decision from there. If its worth just staying in something with no actual commitment or if y’all can move forward and pass this ‘talking stage.’ Now if you wanna directly let him know how you feel about him first than do that. When you want something, you have to directly go and get it boo. No more beating around the bush, because for all he knows, you might just be okay with being a link and not want anything serious. So if you know this guy cares about you and isnt seeing anyone else, let him know what you want.
  • Someone asked:
    on March 19, 2023 4:49 am
    How do I say no to people when they offer me something i know isn’t right for me? How do I stay focused to grow by myself
    • SLC replied:
      on March 19, 2023 1:21 pm
      At the end of the day, you know right from wrong, and you know yourself. If someone is offering you something that you know isn’t for you, reject it! “NO” is a complete sentence. point, blank, period. If they’re continuing to pressure you even after saying you don’t want it, then those aren’t the type of people you need to be around. you have to be okay with not always going with the crowd if it goes against what you want. you have to be okay with standing up for yourself. most importantly, you have to be okay with people NOT liking you. You cannot please everyone, and the quicker you realize that, the easier it will be to stay focused on yourself and what you want.
  • Someone asked:
    on February 27, 2023 7:53 am
    Hey babes ❤️💫You’re Really doing a great Job of Raising Awareness among ladies I’m so proud of you. Keep it up Sis
    • SLC replied:
      on February 28, 2023 2:07 am
      awww thank you so much lovely 💖 that honestly means the world to me! That’s exactly what I’m here for💞💞
  • Someone asked:
    on February 27, 2023 7:37 am
    Hi sis, my concern is , Is it right to get back Together with my bf after a long period of time of separation let say 5 yrs when each one of us has excelled in all aspects Of Life that is Spiritually, Financially,Socially,Emotionally, Academically The reason behind the separation is that , my Bf thought i was giving all of me while he was still kinda not ready and pre occupied with many things(separated while i was 19 and him being 20) He felt Guilty For Not loving me Correctly as i Did For Him. I was even streseed out because of that, he asked us to part ways and asked me not being Stressed since we all have a future to pursue. Now we live as best Friends, very close friends where we help each Other in time of any difficulty. We still have the same love and affection in our Hearts. I think he’s the right guy to spend this Life Journey with. Sis , is it right for us to get back Together?! What if the wait takes so long, should i opt for Another guy?honestly, im in Love with Him and i think its worth it Fighting For Him cause Everyone gonna break our Heart sometime for some reason Please advise me , i really want to make the best Decision for my life
    • SLC replied:
      on February 28, 2023 2:28 am
      hi babe, from what you’re telling me, I sense no sort of toxicity or any reason why you should be cautious of the relationship. It just sounds like you two made the best decision you could for the both of you guys at the time. Sometimes the saying ‘right person, wrong timing’ is true. I think that if you feel like you’re still in love with him and vice versa, (plus the healthy relationship you two have) why not give it another shot if that’s where your heart is? You both won’t know until you try. I would advise you two to start slowly though and not rush into it with the mindset of those 5 years apart didn’t happen. You’re going to have to get to know one another again romantically. It’s been 5 years, and as much as he’s your good friend now, there are still things about him that have changed and things about you that have changed as well. So honor those changes when you two come back together. I’m wishing you both the best, i hope he is your person🤍
  • Someone asked:
    on February 27, 2023 2:48 am
    So ive been waiting for the person ive been seeing to finally be ready to be in a Exclusive relationship and i just feel like ive been waiting for so long. Should i give him an ultimatum? Like either be with me seriously or im Gone?
    • SLC replied:
      on February 28, 2023 2:14 am
      the real problem is that it shouldn’t even get to the point where you have to give an ultimatum. There’s no reason why you should even be sitting around waiting for a person to make their mind up about you. A man will know if really he wants you, if there’s confusion then that’s your answer right there. Like my fave YouTubers Breeny Lee said in one of her videos “If the dating is hard, it’s only gonna be harder once you convince them to be in a relationship with you. Reject struggle love.”🎯 You shouldn’t even need to be convincing him to be with you exclusively. If he wanted to be with you he would not risk the chance of losing you. Reject struggle love babe
  • Someone asked:
    on February 23, 2023 6:47 pm
    hello i just wanna open up <3 ive been feeling down lately cause i been so focused on work and getting myself together its hard for me to figure what time i have For myself and when to go out & have fun take cute pics & be myself.My bf is going through a super tough time So i understand we cant be out i truly dont blame anything on him tbh but im in this depressive mood whenever im on instagram and see all these insta girls out taking pics and having fun i get mad at myself because im young and arent even able to have time to do that myself and get ready dont get me wrong im a baddie when its time to pop out but because i have been in my bag im always so private and i wanna stop hiding myself any advice on how to work on not comparing myself and my life to others and pressuring myself to have everything figured out and geniunely just being happy with myself 😭 any tips to just give myself some self love .. im going through it but thanks for the time ✨
    • SLC replied:
      on February 24, 2023 5:20 pm
      hi babe! I know its gonna sound so cliche but the grass really isn’t greener on the other side. I know you see these girls going out and living life but most of the time it’s really a facade. You gotta remember that Instagram is a lot of these girls’ jobs and so if they have to make it seem like their life is lit, that’s what they’re gonna do. If these ig baddies are making you feel depressed, you gotta stop checking up on them. Unfollow, mute, or even block accordingly. Nothing is worth jeopardizing your mental health. You said your boyfriend is going through a hard time and I salute you for being there for him and understanding that he might not be up for going out all the time. With that being said, that doesn’t mean that you have to be home not enjoying your life either. The only way you can be the best girlfriend to him is if you’re your best you for yourself. If you need to get dolled up and pop out like a baddie more often than you do now, then girl do that. Even if you dont have plans. I think just seeing ourselves looking good is a great confidence/energy booster. My tips would be to give yourself more time for self-care (i know you’re grinding right now but we all need a break), make sure you’re always engaging in postive self-talk, have a support system (even if your bf is dealing with something, I think he still needs to be there for you when you need him), do things that make you happy, Dress up, and if your boyfriend or your friends can’t go, take yourself out, allow yourself some grace and continue to implement self-acceptance/growth. Lastly, don’t compare yourself to anybody but YOU. This is your life, what people on social media got going on is none of your concern. Don’t live for the pictures/videos, live for the real life momements.
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