Is Your Boyfriend Not Listening To You When You Vent?

Are Your Girls Tired Of Giving You Advice About The Same Guy Every Other Week? 

Do You Need Advice On Things That You Just Don’t Want To Share With Your Family & Friends?

Well, No Need To Worry Because I Gotchu Boo! SLC Is Here To Be Your Personal (Unlicensed Ofc) Therapist And Help Give You Advice On Anything And Everything.

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Answers So Far..

  • Someone asked:
    on June 29, 2024 2:14 am
    We’ve been married for 6 years, we have two daughters (2 & 4) and i get no praise, compliments, attention, or respect anymore. It’s embarrassing and hurtful. What advice do you have to make my man appreciate and adore me? I know i have a lot to offer and am a bass ass mom/wife fir my family, he just needs to step up and show me love and respect.
    • SLC replied:
      on July 2, 2024 1:51 am
      hi love, i’m so sorry you feel under-appreciated in your marriage. The last thing you should be asking for is adoration from your own husband. I won’t lie to you though, like you said you’re a badass mom/wife so if he’s not already adoring you just from that alone, there’s nothing you can (or should need to) do to make him see that.You shouldn’t have to be doing anymore than you already are to get his attention. Now i’m not a married woman or a mom so i don’t have the personal experience on how the work/parent life balance may take a toll on relationships, however, i know it shouldn’t be to the point where he isn’t respecting you anymore. I think you just need to be open and honest with him and have a conversation about this. That way you can understand where his head is at and he can know how you feel. Again, i’m not gonna use the kids/life as an excuse, but he may just not what he’s doing (or isn’t doing for this matter). Sometimes men are dumb lol. Some men just expect us to know how they feel about us and that we should just assume it without being told. You need to tell him about your love language (which sounds like words of affirmation), ask about his love language (maybe he could feel under appreciated by you as well), tell him how hurt you feel or how it affects your confidence with your marriage, express to him that there are certain things you’d like for him to change/work on, and definitely don’t ‘threaten’ him, but let him know that he does not wanna lose this badass wife of his. At the end of the day humans aren’t mind readers and so with thay closed mouths don’t get fed. This is your husband. I know you it should be common nature for him to be treating you like the queen you are, but sometimes you just have to remind him. You should be able to openly express how you feel and for both of you to be able to continuously grow in this marriage. Wishing your marriage all the best💖
  • Someone asked:
    on June 27, 2024 3:58 pm
    So i know this one man is my person, and i know you’re probably already rolling your eyes lol. But i know he is for sure, deep down he truly resonates with me. but we met when i was desperate and he was just a plain loser, so our past is horrible, and of course everyone i know hatess him. So we’re currently in Separation growing, leveling up. And i know he needs to learn karmic lessons before coming back in divine timing so i’m not AS upset at his absence. But when he comes back after so long, how do you think i should deal with his return? Setting boundaries is definitely a must, but what about everyone around me’s disapproval? And how to trust my intuition to know if It’d even be right?
    • SLC replied:
      on July 2, 2024 2:12 am
      girlllll i didn’t even roll my eyes😅, if you truly believe this man is your person then there’s nothing me or anyone else can say about it. I’m actually very happy that you two are working on yourselves separately before coming back together. I don’t know either of your pasts when it comes to one another but i do know that growth & grace are two powerful things, so when you two do come back together, whatever happens in the past can be left in the past. When you two do get back together, have a talk about you both want this relationship to go this time. Definitely set those boundaries, hold one another accountable and continue to growth together. When it comes to other peoples disapproval, it really shouldn’t matter if this is the man you are 100% confident that you want to be with. They won’t see it at first, but if he really has grown and changed into a better man, then eventually they’ll come around. If they don’t then thats just how life goes sometimes. This is your relationship, no one else’s so you gotta listen to your gut. You gotta know if this is worth fighting for. I know you are set on this is your person, but if you two get back together and it doesn’t feel right, then listen to that. You will know what’s best for you at the end of the day. Don’t ignore it for the potential of something. What you’re shown in front of you is what you’re going to get. Don’t fight your intuition, it’s there to guide you.
  • Someone asked:
    on June 27, 2024 3:54 pm
    This kind of falls under an insecurity question as well, but how to become your own muse? I know i’m her, without a doubt, and i have a lot of love that i give to myself, but at the same time, im always on pinterest saving pretty girls to my board and i wouldn’t say studying them but you get the point. How to turn the attention i give other beautiful women back to me and me only?
    • SLC replied:
      on July 2, 2024 2:23 am
      inspiration from other people can be real motivating, however if it gets to the point where you’re comparing yourself to them, then it goes form motivating to unhealthy. At the end of the day, the only person you can be, is you. You have to put yourself on that pedestal. Yes these girls are inspiring and beautiful, but so are you. I made a post before, (hopefully you saw it) but in one of the slides, it basically said that you have to stop looking for inspo and BECOME your OWN inspo. You have to see yourself the way you see them. Better yet, you have to see yourself in an even better light. You said you’re her, so carry yourself like it. Act like it. Become it. Explore what makes you, you. I mean why would you wanna be in this life being a carbon copy of someone else? Whether its through your make up, hair, outfits etc, learn you. When you put the focus in yourself, the less you even think about what everyone else has going on. I love pinterest, i love pretty women, i love seeing women live lifestyles that i wanna live (shit lol thats basically my whole brand), however i know how to separate feeling inspired from feeling envious. You have to remind yourself that you are just as good, just as beautiful and just as capable as all those women you see. If they can do it, so can you. YOU’RE HER!!!!!
  • Someone asked:
    on June 27, 2024 3:50 pm
    Hey boo, i love your page and just wanted to know, how to become a content creator? But mentally first. I Don’t know why i have so many issues committing to daily posting and getting my content out there, and every time i start i stop. Do you suggest any apps or motivators? As a creative, doing anything Consistently is very important, and i want to be able to be that girl.
    • SLC replied:
      on July 2, 2024 2:41 am
      hi babes! lemme tell you, it took me a while to even commit to this. i went back n forth for sooo long and procrastinated until i was literally just like .. girl the time you’re wasting could be time put in to actually starting. i got to the point where i was like, this is what i want.. i know i can get it … so whats the worse that can happen? i think my ‘why’ was and still is my biggest motivator. I do this because it’s what makes me happy and just knowing that alone is what keeps me consistent. Ask yourself why you want be a content creator. what is your ‘why’ and ask yourself if its strong enough to keep you going… if it isn’t then that may not be your why. You just have to see the bigger picture of where this can all go for you and let that be your driving factor. Also ask yourself what the real reason is why you can’t be consistent. is it fear? is it just not your passion? Figure out what it really is thats holding you back. I know it’s hard to stay motivated when you’re not getting engagement or you feel a artistic barrier, however you just have to push through all that. Even if its one like, let that one like motivate you to get 20 and then 100 and then 1000 etc. I think planning out your content is a good way to motivate you as well. It can help you get everything on your mind into actual areas to start and help keep you on a schedule. i personally use Notion or just my notes when i feel a spark of content inspo coming. There are definitely so many other apps out there like Planoly, buffer, and preview but i personally don’t use all that. Every creator is different so you gotta figure out what works for you and roll with it. hope this helps boo, get that content out there😘
  • Someone asked:
    on June 26, 2024 5:04 am
    How to handle insecurity to my fellow woman?
    • SLC replied:
      on June 27, 2024 1:59 pm
      now from this question im not sure what type of insecurities you’re dealing with, but im going to assume its self insecurities. Insecurities are things that as humans we’re bound to feel, however you are in control of your mind and theres so many ways to quiet down these insecurities. the best way to deal with insecurities is to turn them into something you can embrace. I know its easier said than done, but redirecting your thoughts/attitude is the best way to deal with insecurities. Practice more self love, remind yourself of the things that you like/love about yourself (write them down if you have to), look good, feel good – embrace your beauty. use positive affirmations/self-talk that can redirect the insecurity, understand where the insecurity is coming from and work your way into breaking it down, give yourself grace/compassion, less comparison to others – the grass isnt always greener on the other side (i won’t say stop it fully because as humans its a innate feeling to compare ourselves to others, just don’t do it to the point where it is debilitating), if you’re able to, try out therapy. hope this helps xoxo
  • Someone asked:
    on June 25, 2024 4:40 pm
    What made you become a digital creator? Any advice you give to others?
    • SLC replied:
      on June 27, 2024 12:21 pm
      honestly i never even wanted to be a digital creator at first😂 my main goal was to just start my own business but i never really had any direction on how to go about it. I knew that i did wanna stay within the ‘mental health/self development’ niche because thats what i had always been passionate about. At first i was gonna start a blog and just try to build up on that, but i realized it just wasnt for me lol.then i remember joining this ‘business’ webinar one day and the girl hosting it had said you should build a community before you just jump right out and sell products. So that had really got me thinking like hmmm she’s right i do need a community of like-minded people and thats when i started doing heavy research on instagram. I’m a very lowkey person so i knew i didnt want the page to be based on me personally but i knew that i wanted it to be something that i personally would wanna follow. I love self development and i love making people feel good, so i knew thats the type of content i wanted to give out. i had been following similar ‘quote’ accounts for years on my personal page and was like i can literally do this, but make it more .. ‘me’. I always tell people that ‘dash.slc’ is literally made for me😅 its an account that i would wanna follow and support because it embodies everything that i love. Anyhow it took me months to finally get the courage to make the account and start posting (my earlier stuff was not cute lmao and yes theyre all archived), and the rest is literally history. My advice to others wanting to become a digital creator is to just be consistent asf. thats really it, without consistency (especially in the beginning), youre not gonna blow up the way you want to. Be consistent, engage with your followers and like-minded accounts, put out quality content and just have patience. Not everyone gets 10,000 followers overnight. Be grateful in the fact that if you’re content is getting to even just one person and making them feel better or inspiring them, thats all that really matters.
  • Someone asked:
    on June 22, 2024 1:57 pm
    I just moved to a new state, no family, no friends. And i Randomly decided that i wanted to make an online digital marketing type of business. Any tips, i’m overwhelmed because i feel like it won’t go like i intend for it to and its very discouraging. It’s called @theimjustagirlguide and the idea is for it to be a place where girls(people) come to get digital products ranging from invitation to tips on how to move out, travel etc. And I know businesses don’t just grow Overnight, but I haven’t even seen an ounce of engagement….I just need any tips you may have.
    • SLC replied:
      on June 27, 2024 12:39 pm
      firstly, im giving you a follow literally after i write this all out. Very proud of you for even starting the account, Lord knows it took me monthsssss to even create dash. secondly, before i get into the tips you need, my first word of advice is to be patient. like you said, businesses dont grow overnight, don’t compare yourself to big accounts that have been in the game for years. If you can get 1 engagement, you can get 100, so don’t stress over the analytics so soon. Whether its 2 engagements or 2000, be proud of yourself. Now for the tips (i’ve already answered similar questions so im gonna just copy and paste the tips) 1. One thing I would say is consistency. Literally from 0 followers I was consistent from the jump. I posted every day back then, didn’t matter if I got 0 likes or 1000 likes, I was always consistent. If I wasn’t posting on my feed then I’d make sure I’d have a story up 2. Engaging with similar accounts helped a lot too because we would help one another grow. I found accounts within my niche and would follow them and engage with their content. You’d be surprised how many big accounts followed me when I only had 100-300 followers. I spent 15-30 mins engaging with accounts before or after posting. 3. Hashtags!! Hashtags honestly helped me out so much when I was growing up my account. It let people who were within my niche find me. You’d be surprise how many people follow hashtags and find accounts through them. I made sure I researched the best hashtags for my page and used them on every post. Even now I still use them just because you never know who can find you from it 4. Promo! I didn’t do this until I had maybe 3,000- 5,000 followers because I was iffy on if it would work but honestly my account blew up after the first promo I paid for. I think i spent like $40 for a span of 5 days or something like that. I chose the specific audience for my promo to reach just based on my niche and yeah it gave me over 500+ followers. I think I promo’d my page around 6 times, I don’t use it anymore but it really did work when I was building up my account. Hope this helps you boo, definitely send me a dm if you have more questions😘
  • Someone asked:
    on June 21, 2024 10:39 pm
    Okay, so I’ve been speaking to this boy since the ending of November last year til now. Over, the six months I have became emotionally and physically attached to him in some type of way, and head too. But I started to realize, It’s been a minute of us talking and he hasn’t asked me to be his girlfriend or anything. When it was like 3 months I started to think like this but as the month increased, it started to get concerning to me because the months keep increasing and there’s no title. It’s just strong feelings involved on both parties. As I’m talking to him more and more, he has expressed very questionable and traumatic things that he dealt with/toxic behaviors he deals with when it comes to family. Long story short he doesn’t have a relationship with his mom. His mom doesn’t love him. He has also expressed, how he has been heartbroken really badly and it messed him up really badly and how he’s depressed. The reason why he mentioned all of this because I used to look at his repost on TikTok and it would be reposts about missing someone your on bad terms with. Before he even brought this all up. There was one time I checked him on it and I was like if you know your not over someone in the past I don’t think we should be speaking and he made it seem like it wasn’t that I guess because he didn’t want to speak about that , but he was ready that’s everything he said. He also expressed that even though he might not show it he has strong feelings for me and that he loved me. But he then also he has stated that I guess him going through all that, his guard is all the way up and he can’t see him self loving anymore so that point in my head it was like, why are speaking to me but at the same time I understand what he meant. And at that moment it lead me to believe that the reason he hasn’t put a title because he’s heartbroken and he isn’t healed, but he’s still trying when it comes to me. Being that he has his guard up and he’s damaged, there are certain behaviors that he can portray when it comes to us and it can be draining to me. So one night that happened, and I basically said “ stay pissin me off. honestly just leave me the fuckk alone. think it’s best we do each other a favor and leave each other alone. we both have our own internal battles. it’s been quite a beautiful time knowing each other but “us” is obviously going no where, your guard is up, and there’s obviously slight tension. So I’ll save my self the crash out/hurt and take my self out the equation. However, wish you the best and I’m genuinely extremely proud of you on everything you’re doing. And congratulations on everything that is about to come your way.” Ever since that the WHOLE dynamic of us, changed. He doesn’t call me everyday anymore, just nothing. Even when I be upset about something he does try to come together and talk about. Ever since that? Nothing. I even voiced my concerns about it. I even said how if anything I said hurt your feelings I didn’t mean it like that. I was trying to get u to a place where you could feel safe enough with me to express your feelings without feeling like someone’s about to get you. And I was just saying how we can take baby steps to help you get to a place where you feel safe. But don’t gohst me. He didn’t even respond to that he just said, I’m not ghosting you, I’m thinking, we’ll talk soon. And how I need to stop overthinking. When I see its days and he still hasn’t called me, I would text him again pouring out my heart and his response was how he was really busy that week and sorry that he gave me the impression he didn’t wanna talk to me. At that moment I felt like he was gaslighting me because even he’s busy, he still MAKES TIME. That is one thing about him. Long story what I’m really asking is what do you think is going on with him? What do you think is his thought process on this whole situation? What do you think is going on like… why do you think the whole energy shifted ever since I said that? Idk like what you think happened? Like I’m confused he never liked me? I just..I just don’t know.
    • SLC replied:
      on June 27, 2024 1:40 pm
      before i answer your questions on your confusion of why he’s moving the way he is now, i just wanna be real with you and say, it wouldnt be the best idea for you two to even continue what you got going on. He is clearly emotionally unavailable. Unfortunately from his mom, to his heartbreak, he’s not at a point where he’s fully healed and even ready to commit to you. “People who are at war with themselves cannot give you peace.” Don’t get me wrong, i do think he has feelings for you, but i don’t think those feelings are strong enough to where he wants to officially be with you, title and all. You both are clearly on two different levels in terms of the relationship. You clearly want something more serious while he wants to continue to go with the flow based on his traumas. I think it’s very admirable of you to want to help him during this time when it comes to healing, but you are not a therapist baby. He needs to heal on his own time and you can’t force anybody to be ready. In terms of your actual questions now, i think theres two parts on why the energy has shifted. 1. it’s because you contradicted yourself and that upset him. like you said, “I was trying to get u to a place where you could feel safe enough with me to express your feelings without feeling like someone’s about to get you. And I was just saying how we can take baby steps to help you get to a place where you feel safe.” however the initial message you had sent to him where you told him to ‘leave you the fuck alone’ & ‘its best if we leave each other alone’, doesn’t show him the safe place you’re trying to convey. Its like you’re telling him youre his safe space but then in the same breath saying you’re over the situation. I can see how that might make him feel guarded now and have a ‘whats the point’ attitude. ON THE OTHER SIDE THOUGH. i think the second part of why his energy shifted is because 2. he knows that you’re right. he’s distant now because you called him out on what it really is. You guys aren’t going no where like you said and his guard is up. People don’t like being called out on their own bs and that’s probably why his energy has shifted now. Overall, I think you and I (and him too) know that this relationship isn’t going to work. He needs to heal. I’m not saying that people can’t be in a relationship while healing, however he clearly isn’t ready for that at all. It doesn’t make sense to continue something that has no end goal. Whether you wanna be friends with him and support him from a distance is up to you, but a relationship is just not in the picture for right now .. or ever. You shouldn’t have to wait for someone to be ready for you babe. You deserve to be with someone who will emotionally be there for you as you are for them.
  • Someone asked:
    on June 21, 2024 1:17 am
    i Recently just met this boy and he is my Managers Nephew, I started To really like him and he seemed like he wanted nothing but the best for me … giving me advice if needed , making sure i prayed every morning etc. so thennn he birthday trip with his uncle (my manger) came so i seen him before he left . He was being distant on the trip but im very understanding and he also told me he wasnt feeling well (fevers) . So when he got back home im guessing he was still having those fevers and was still being distant a little (we still was talking everyday just not like before) so i was checking up making sure he didnt need anything … he usually tells me to come see him or calls me (mind you we havent been otp since before the trip) didnt bring it up because he was sick . so yesterday we texted @12:15 about some medicine but i didnt get another response after I responded to him , so then i asked him was he okay @5:15 pm no response … then i proceed to say “oh you got me fucked upp” being funny not serious, but still no response . she today i called him off my friends phone he didnt answer but he called back ( i didnt pick up) … so just leave him alone huh?😭
    • SLC replied:
      on June 21, 2024 2:11 pm
      hmmmm it could honestly be one of two things. he can one, literally just not be feeling well which is why he’s lacking with his communication (which is honestly understandable, i go ghost when im not feeling well) or two, he’s actually being distant because he’s not feeling you as much anymore. Tbh i personally think it’s just the first one, especially seeing as you guys were still communicating on a daily basis just not as much as when he was feeling okay. I say just hit him up again and ask him what’s going on so you can really get some clarity. if he’s ‘better’ and you still feel the distance then i would say that’s more concerning. Just give him a call to check-in, if he’s still dry or distant with no proper reasoning, then let it go.
  • Someone asked:
    on June 21, 2024 1:04 am
    heyy i feel like im still growing as a young woman but sometimes people can knock me off my game and make me feel least than … maybe i need to focus more on me and love me more but i feel like i am doing that , its just when people do things to me i tend to question myself … like “is it because im tall “ or what am i doing wrong even when i know im not the issue … things like that . I just need advice please help me !
    • SLC replied:
      on June 21, 2024 2:06 pm
      hi lovely, tbh as hard as it may seem to do, you just have to ignore the opinon/comments of other people. Obviously we’re human and we just naturally care about how others perceive us, but you can’t let it get to the point where its making you question yourself/your worth. Like you said, you need to focus on YOU and improve your own self love. you need to take other peoples opinions of you with a grain of salt, because at the end of the day, you can’t please everyone. someone will always find something to say, so theres no point in trying to live up to anyones expectations but your own. You’re growing into your womanhood, all you need to be focused on is you and your growth. be nice to yourself and show yourself the same love you’d show others
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